"Flare day" mean that your pain is super high for no apparent reason, your energy is super low for no apparent reason, or both. It's a term used by the chronic illness and chronic pain community.
I'm in the midst of a flare day right now. Here's what it's like:
-no masking. don't make me. cameras are off. trying to fake my way through small talk today is a big no. trying to promote myself today is a big no.
-filter is off. i don't have the bandwidth to sugar-coat things.
-i do zero extra skincare steps. i'll be lucky if i get a shower in today because everything is an effort.
-i WISH i had energy!! it's not a matter of feeling down. i WANT to do things. fatigue is awful! ask anyone: i'm constantly doing things and chasing after ideas.
-i tried to meditate for mental energy. i fell asleep.
-i am writing this lying down and covered with a blanket for comfort
-i need the convenience meals. i don't wanna cook, even though cooking gives me a lot of enjoyment.
-grammar? punctuation? if i'll still be understood, i don't care. even though people who know me know that i pride myself on speaking properly.
Every aspect of life gets broken down into what is strictly necessary to function. And it's not a motivation problem. I am HIGHLY motivated to get things done, to maintain my home, to care for myself. My body and energy levels are just not there.
Bonus: I have no idea when flare days will happen. So on a regular day, I'm pushing myself to get ahead just in case my body decides to torture me the next day.
It's not fun.
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